63: Body Image

I have been down this road before , only having one breast. For some reason this time around it has been harder for me. I know the reason is primarily the whole healing process taking so long due to my damaged radiated skin. Because of the open wound on my chest wall I am not cleared to wear a prosthetic breast. Clothes are challenging, as some tops it is really obvious that I only have one breast. People do stare, it is saddening to me, sometimes to the point where I want to cry…however I have managed to stay positive with the help of  the therapist provided by the Palm Springs Comprehensive Center. Dr. Chatigny has been wonderful in keeping me focused on my journey and this curve ball that has been thrown my way. I have been surrounding myself to close family members and friends that understand my journey and are thoughtful and bring me good positive ju-ju ! I managed to avoid an infection when my wound was open and about the size of a quarter. Staying home and working on little projects here and there have kept me busy… not to mention a little four-year old! I have also been hiking up at the Palm Springs Tramway with friends and my sister-in-law Ginger.

I never thought that Body Image would affect the way it did, however as the time went by I have become more and more comfortable with the obvious of only having one breast. And at this point I will not be getting sized for a prosthesis, people can stare all they want, this is the reality of Breast Cancer…maybe I should put a sticker on my concave chest wall that says  “Under Reconstruction”

On July 20th I had an Angio CT of the abdomen and pelvis area, the purpose of the exam was to check for blood flow. My next surgery has been scheduled. I will be having a Diep flap breast reconstruction on October 11th. My next appointment with my PS is on September 24th, I will have more details of my surgery then and will blog about it.

In the meantime I will be spending time with a dear friend that was diagnosed with breast cancer and will be having a bilateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction . Maybe this is why I had my little setbacks or as Dr. Eko said “this is just a bump in the road” It is no secret that when my reconstructive surgery is done my husband and I will be moving back to Maui. Moving to Maui has been postponed but it will happen. Well, my little setback has enabled me to be here for my friend Catherina.

For those of you that have read my blogs from the beginning you will recognize her name as she was the Mammography Technologist that assisted the Radiologist with my biopsies back in 2015, and has also done my scans at the Cancer Center. Catherina is about to start her journey, as she was diagnosed with breast cancer… I am glad I am here to help her out post surgery.

This blog will not have any sensitive pictures attached, blog #62 is a pictorial blog with pictures of the slow healing process

Mahlo for reading my blog

Pina